Don’t Believe in Yourself. Believe in Something Bigger.
Your career is going well. Very well. You have the admiration of your peers. Your supervisor looks at you with a sense of almost parental pride. Your clients give you consistently rave reviews. On top of all this, you are financially well compensated. Your promotions come without even you asking for them. Even by your own ambitious standards you had set yourself earlier in your career, you have far exceeded them. Those painful steps of building a regime of self-discipline early on had paid off. You clearly now have the Midas touch.
Yet, for some reason, all is not well. Everything in your workplace which had previously transformed to gold upon your touch, now gives a bit of a rusty sheen. Your normally high levels of naturally flowing motivation at work seemed to have dimmed down of late. Instead of cloud nine you are situated on mount mellow. No matter how much you try and force yourself back to your previous work performance levels, you lack the same drive that drove you just months before. Were you not being challenged enough? Had you lost interest? Were you bored?
No, it was something deeper. Slowly it dawns upon you that something inside you had fundamentally changed. You seek something else now. You had taken all these labors to climb a mountain, only to reach the summit and realize you were at the bottom of a valley. All that success born out of your personal abilities was now taking you to the starting point of a new journey.
The Limits of Self-Belief
As author Scott Peck famously wrote, “Life is difficult.” Particularly the early stage of life, when we are forming our identities, and often absorb negative experiences that later lead to persistent doubts, insecurities and egos that we tackle with for the rest of our lives. Much of this early phase is spent needing to ‘prove oneself’, as in, needing to demonstrate amply our talents and confidence to the world. We overcome obstacles and accomplish worthy glories based on this strong focus on becoming the most productive self.
Whether we call it the call for self-esteem, self-development or self-belief, there exists in our modern day culture a powerful voice telling us to build our abilities so we may one day build our own castle. While this may seem positive on the surface, often it can border on a unhealthy preoccupation on just our own life and concerns, while neglecting the larger ecosystem we live in. For a certain percentage of us, we begin to see that limiting our life focus to just the self can at some point wear thin, and in the long run, be wholly unfulfilling. We decide to stop serving the self and begin to search for something larger.
What do you stand for?
This is the point when we start to ask the bigger questions. Is this all there is to life and work? What else do I do with my gifts and opportunities? At the end of my life, what will I be known for?
Once we stop serving our small self, our sense of self actually expands. We begin to think of our vision, our purpose, our destiny, our passion, or any other lofty-sounding point of focus that will gravitate us. We understand that rather than be identified as an self-absorbed individual, we can serve a larger design. We become less concerned with what we do than what we stand for.
This is the time when careerists switch tracks, businesspeople find their defining ideas and leaders find a new degree of boldness in their steps. Our personal brand becomes less about what qualities we have and more about what causes inspire us. The inspiration may be altruistic or innovative, collectivist or capitalist, but it captures us in its grip and will not let go until we yield to its service.
Find What Activates You
People who wait for inspiration to come may end up waiting for a long time. Rather, inspiration is for those who venture out and search for that which will broaden their vistas. Even if there is period of being in the wilderness, your time will come so long as you are searching outside your norm. Volunteering, taking a retreat or sabbatical from work, researching your industry or studying your own background and psychology may all be worthy steps to find your own path.
What do you seek for? Not that which just interests you or appeals to you, but which activates you. Which drives you into action that doesn’t require too much second guessing and can sustain you with its energizing effect.
It is rare that we can do this alone. Which is why finding a guide, be it a coach, mentor or confidante, is important to illuminate the path for us. And remaining patient is also a prerequisite for seeing the bigger picture.
Move beyond your self-belief.
